I have to admit when I started writing a blog about writing I never thought I’d be writing an article referencing three British idiots who talk about cars and give each other grief but it occurred to me today that the team at Top gear have done something amazingly smart and it’s something I don’t see often in fiction.

What Top gear did is take a specialised topic and make it accessible to a wide audience. If you’ve ever spoken to “car people” about their favourite topic then you know how boring cars can be made to be…yet Top Gear makes it all interesting because they realised the most important thing about Top Gear is that it’s not really about cars.

It’s about entertainment. Yes being a car show is the framework they use, but watching James, Jeremy and Hammond snark at each other and do stupid things could have covered shows about any number of things. Cars were a smart choice as most of us have at least a peripheral interest in them and watching flash cars being put through their paces is fun…

But they have not lost sight of the fact that Top gear’s job is to entertain first and present facts and details second. That has allowed a show that could have died a show for car boffins to become an international hit.

If you’d like a literary example then I can suggest Scott Sigler’s GFL (Galactic Football league) series. There are few sports I care about less about than American Football (competitive sneezing?) but Scott Sigler managed to make a football story into something I really wanted to read by weaving in aliens, crime and a fun fast paced feel to the story. As a result I not only loved his books, I developed more of an interest in American Football as a result because his obvious passion for the game swept me up and carried me along even as I was reading about alien wide receivers.

The upshot of all of this is that almost anything can be made appealing to a wide audience if you write it well enough. No matter what your story a hero we can cheer for (and sympathise with), a story that intrigues us and characters that come to life on the page can sell a book about anything.

If pushing metaphors is ever declared a crime I will never see daylight again.

The fighting, sniping and name calling is getting ridiculous and it’s incredibly intimidating for writers just starting out to see all of this hate filled scrapping amongst a group of people that should know better.

First things first, let’s get two things straight: Someone who wants to be traditionally published is not a moron. Yes they may (may) make less money that way, but that doesn’t make them stupid. Also someone who wants to self publish is not necessarily publishing unreadable drek. Yes the bad stuff happens, but assuming that’s the goal of all self published authors is ignoring the excellent work of many self published authors.

It should be a moot point anyway because it doesn’t matter how you’re published – if you’re getting into publishing now then you will be self promoted…at least you will be if you want a career.

There will be the odd anomaly who gets a huge push from a publisher or superb word of mouth and won’t have to do their own promotion (Suzanne Collins comes to mind) but relying on being this anomaly is like relying on winning the lottery as your retirement plan: theoretically possible but not even close being a good idea.

Those of us who’d actually like a writing career are going to have to push for it. That means marketing ourselves through social media, blogs, interviews and side projects. If you’re self published you’re not going to get any help with this and if you’re traditionally published chances are you will be well advised to supplement whatever your publisher is doing with your own efforts.

Technology is going to keep changing, faster than ever, and publishing is going to change with it whether it wants to or not. It doesn’t matter.

You are still a storyteller; your greatest task in all of this is to tell the best story you can and keep a eye on the best way for you* to get that story out to the world.

And if you come across another writer, see what you can do to help each other. It will benefit both of you far more than getting into a fight over differences that mean nothing.

* I really mean you, not other people. Someone else’s method for getting published might just not be your thing. Listen to what other people are saying, make sure they have data to back up their arguments and then make your own decision.

I don’t often do movie reviews but sometimes a movie breaks through the awesome barrier and I just have to tell someone about it.

Consider this your mild spoiler warning.

The Avengers is as good as you hope it will be, or at least it was as good as I hoped it would be and considering my expectations of Joss Whedon as a director and my love of The Avengers as a concept that is saying something.

Joss Whedon can name his price now. He can do what he wants.

In some ways it’s hard to know where to begin. The only real starting point I have is the one thing wrong with The Avengers. It’s a little long at the beginning. That’s it, I can’t think of anything else I would have changed.

You get to see all the throw downs fans of the comics have been hoping for. Hulk vs Thor, Iron Man vs Thor… I wasn’t really expecting to see Black Widow fighting Hawkeye but that’s awesome too. It says something for the latter half of the movie that all of these confrontations happen in the first half.

The second half is where Joss Whedon clearly decided that playtime was over and it was time to wreck some stuff.

Everyone comes across well, and enough time is spent on each character that they feel like real characters and not just ticked boxes. Robert Downey Jr. is a stand out as Tony Stark as always, but it was Mark Ruffalo’s Bruce Banner that really surprised me. He plays Banner as a haunted, nervous man forever frightened of what he calls “The Other Man”.

The Hulk itself himself (itself?) gets some of the funniest moments in the entire film, especially in the last fifteen minutes. His ongoing battle with Thor is a highlight of the entire film.

Scarlett Johansson is going to get a lot of flak for just being eye candy, but I think Natalia Romanov (Black Widow) actually has a heavy impact on the film, and she brings the right amount of badassery and vulnerability to a role that could easily have been a throwaway.

Tom Hiddleston brings some real menace to main bad dude Loki. In the Thor film he always seemed out matched, but in The Avengers he actually seems like a real threat. His army is almost one hundred percent mook but they’re sufficiently threatening punching bags that it’s awesome seeing them get smacked down.

Especially the leviathan floating snake/lizard/things. The ten year old me inside was cheering when The Hulk first punched one in the face.

Samuel L. Jackson plays Nick Fury almost straight, although there’s a certain amount of self awareness to his performance, he knows we want to see him being badass and that’s exactly what he gives us.
I was worried that Captain America was going to fall flat amongst the other heavy hitters, but Chris Evans really gives Steve Rogers some soul, not to mention some baddassery in his own right and by the end of the film I could really believe his Captain America leading The Avengers. He has a moment towards the end of the movie with The Hulk that got a cheer from the entire theatre I was in.

There was a real danger that Hawkeye would have been lost in the same way that Black Widow could have been lost, but again Whedon made the right call with his character and gave him a connection with Natasha that makes them both a huge part of the movie.

Plus he shoots a dude with a bow and arrow while not looking.

The film is surprisingly funny. It was always going to be with Whedon at the helm, but it knows when to poke fun at itself as well as getting in the pithy one-liners.

Exciting, funny, brilliantly written and executed. Go see it.

If you want the short version of this review, then here it is: I loved Blackbirds. I loved it as much as any other Urban Fantasy I’ve ever read, which, considering my almost inappropriate love of The Dresden Files is saying a lot.

I was lucky enough to be sent an ARC of Blackbirds almost a month ago and I’ve been thinking about the book ever since. In a lot of ways it defies an in depth review because a great deal of Blackbirds’ charm is in the many surprises that Wendig pulls on the reader as we follow Miriam Black as she swears, smokes and drinks her way across backwoods America.

Miriam’s talent is that she knows how you’re going to die…or at least she will if you so much as brush her hand. She knows the day, hour, minute and second of your demise and she knows it in graphic detail. She can’t do anything about the impending deaths, she’s tried, but Fate sticks to its plans no matter what she does and her attempts to save people end up with her being responsible for their deaths.

Did I mention this was quite dark?

Miriam has a secondary super power too: the ability to deliver snark at a rate previously only theorised by comedy scientists. There is no situation too awful for Miriam to punctuate it with snort inducing one liners.

Miriam is oddly likable, odd, in that she shouldn’t be likable at all since she’s not really a very nice person, but her situation is so terrible and her attempts to do the right thing so earnest that I couldn’t help but cheer for her as she takes on the book’s bad guys.

The bad guys deserve a special mention. Most book bad guys just don’t cut it. They either represent a threat so far out of the league of the protagonist that there really shouldn’t be much of a story, or they’re really no threat at all to the protagonist and should have been killed off during the first thirty seconds of story. Wendig’s bad guys walk the very fine line between being someone Miriam can fight (or at least flee) and being ridiculously over powered. This delivers some genuinely frightening antagonists especially the hairless, bone scrying meth dealer.

You would not want to wake up with that dude in your living room.

Wendig’s talent (as I may have mentioned before) is making violence and profanity into art, and as much fun as he’s having with this there is also genuine art in the way he’s strung the story together. We’re tantalized with the prospect of finding out how Miriam ended up the way she is and bits and pieces of her past are revealed even as she’s attempting to fight the future Fate seems to have laid out for her. Speaking of Fate I got the sense that Fate was a major antagonist in its own right and as much as the seriously bad dudes were on Miriam’s case Fate hung over her like a black cloud.

Full of violence, sex, drinking swearing and awesome Blackbirds is compulsory reading for anyone who loves urban fantasy, or even just a dman good book.

Despite being given an ARC I bought a physical copy of Blackbirds because this one I want on my shelf at home.

Buy two and give one to someone you like.

You can get Blackbirds (published by Angry Robot Books) from Amazon, B&N, and  Indiebound.

It varies but I try to hit at least 1000 words per day, 2000 for preference. Theoretically this means I should have a novel written every 50 to 100 days or so. Of course it never really works out like that (sadly), but to be fair I don’t hit the target wordcount nearly as often as I should so it’s not really my wordcount’s fault.

For me the more important thing is getting something done every day. I find if I go more than a couple of days without writing I start losing the knack of getting the words out of my head and onto the page.

With the current novel’s end more or less in sight (even if it is a hazy, demon filled mirage in the far distance) it’s more important that I just keep getting words out and maintain the rhythm of what I’m writing.

Do you have a daily/weekly wordcount you try to hit?  How important is it to you?

I can’t answer about Jersey Shore; some things are beyond the ken of mortal man.

But on publishing I do have a little more to say, if only because I’ve talked to people in the know, mostly authors actually making a living writing but also agents and publishers themselves. I am personally utterly unqualified to tell you anything (except perhaps that if you’re leaving your house putting on clothes is a good idea) but I have made some good contacts over the years so I can tell you what they’ve recommended.

Virtually every single one of them has recommended a hybrid approach; the only thing that’s varied between them is which step you go to first. You can self publish first and look at it as a platform to launch your traditional publishing career or you can go the traditional route first and build an audience and then look at self publishing anything your publisher does not want.

Both ways work. I personally think it’s a good idea for new writers to try the agent route first; it forces you to learn what you’re doing and takes away the temptation to dive into self publishing before your ready.

With that said I still think you should self publish. Short story collections, novellas and novelettes as long as they are professionally edited, laid out and have an excellent (read: professional level) cover then self publishing those sorts of product can provide a steady background income for you while you are working on your novel (s).

Of course there are some extremely smart people who disagree with me and make the good point that because self publishing is not the death knell for a career that it used to be we should be self publishing first and then looking at getting an agent and/or a publisher from there.

Here’s where it gets tricky…I think they’re right too. I think that despite what I said two paragraphs ago there is good money to be made self publishing first and if you have already been through the regular publishing gauntlet, or you have had professional level editing on both a story and a line level, then self publishing first is a viable option.

The problem with this method is that new writers often go to it before they’re ready and end up putting out a product that can damage their reputation and poison the well for future sales.

The upshot of all of this is that no one has all the answers, and the only advice that’s truly wrong is dogmatically choosing one method over the other. Self publishing just does not suit everyone. Nor does traditional publishing.

So in 2012 the thing you have to remember is that you have a choice, one you should only make after careful research and consideration. Wanting to publish traditionally does not make you an idiot anymore than self publishing makes you a hack.

Just make sure you know why you’re chosing what ever way of publishing you chose rather than blindly following the people who are shouting the loudest. it;s your career, not theirs.

I’d love to hear what you think about publishing in 2012, even if you think I’m a twit. Let me know in the comments!

Things have suddenly taken off here and I’ve gone from being a little busy to being the anthropomorphic personification of being stretched for time.

Don’t worry, I’m not leaving you, but I’ve had an opportunity come up that I can’t afford to miss** and that’s going to take a serious amount of work on my part. This means for April and May I’m cutting right back on my many projects to concentrate on getting my writing to where it should be.

This means that while I’ll still be posting regularly, most of them will be short posts and the odd review. I’ll still try to get at least one proper advice post in a week and I’ll keep you updated on everything happening to me here.

* In unrelated news, I can see forever.

** I also can’t talk about it too much. It’s just an opportunity, nothing guaranteed.

Be aware that not everyone who tells you to quit is out to get you, or being spiteful.  They may be genuinely trying to help you. Someone who cares about you and wants to help you can be far harder to deal with than someone who’s just being a jerk. Often listening to what they have to say and then coming to an understanding with them about why you write is the best solution.

If someone’s just being a jerk about it, tell them to sod off and die.

1. You’ll Never Make It

Mostly you’ll get this from people who have tried to write a novel and failed. Instead of trying again they’re on a mission to stop anyone else from finishing. They’ll be shocked if you imply that they’re just doing this out of spite, and it’s usually best just to smile, nod and then prove them wrong by finishing your work.

It’s the literary equivalent kicking them in the face.

2. Shouldn’t You be Doing…

On the complete opposite end of the scale are the people who wonder if you shouldn’t be looking after the kids/cleaning the house/doing your assignment/putting out that fire. These people really are trying to help, rather than attempting to crap all over your dreams*…and the real kicker is that more often than not, they’re right and there is something you should be taking care of.

The best way to deal with this is to:

A)   Take care of the things you need to be doing to stop your world ending.

B)    Plan a set period of writing time per day when your loved ones know you’ll be preoccupied with doing something else.

3. You’ll Never Make Any Money

This is one I get all the time, and it’s a bit more subtle than someone telling me outright that I should quit. Often the people who tell you this are actually trying to help. They’re still being dicks, they just might not know it.

The thing is, they might be right, not that many authors make a living writing fiction. You won’t get anywhere arguing with them about that. The better answer is “who cares?”. Just because something is hard doesn’t mean it isn’t worth striving for.

Yes, statistically speaking authors make very little money, and only a tiny percentage make a living. But the statistics don’t take into account all of the available information. For instance: I can’t give you the exact numbers, but I do know that the number of books you finish directly affects your chances of making a living writing. Most writers don’t even finish one book. A huge number of writers quit after just one. I’d like to know what the hard numbers are about the earnings of people prepared to just keep finishing books. If you’re prepared to write ten books I guarantee your odds of doing well are far better than if you’d only finished one.

4. You’re Wasting Your Time

This is a tough one. These people aren’t saying you won’t make any money, or that you’re treading a tough path, they are flat out telling you that writing is a waste of your time because you’re not any good at it.

You would think the answer would depend on whether or not you actually had any writing talent, but it doesn’t.

The answer is that the only way you’ll get better is by writing. Even the most woeful writer can’t help but get better with practise so the criticism that you’re wasting your time is 100% bunk.

Not only is it bunk because you’re getting better but it’s bunk because I have to assume you actually like writing, and doing the things that you like while at the same time improving a skill is the literal opposite of a waste of your lifespan**.

5. It’s Making You Miserable

Writers tend to look miserable. Whether it’s guilt because you just killed off a character’s entire family (barring their pet gerbil…you’re not a monster) or because it’s week two of your holiday and you haven’t written a word, we tend to end up looking owlish and unhappy.

The funny thing is that other people can interpret writing as being the cause of everything that’s wrong in your life and try and help you out.

Most of the time they’re wrong, and the writer they’re trying to help is very happy writing, even if they’re not happy with what they’ve just written.

The one thing you need to be careful of is that writing isn’t taking over your life. Yes you should be writing, and yes you should set aside time to do it, but nothing is worth losing your family and friends over. If someone is concerned because you seem unhappy then no big deal, but if their concern is because you’re withdrawing from the world then that’s something you need to pay attention to.

Write, by all means write, but make sure you get to have a life too.

So…

Has anyone ever told you to quit? What did you do?

* I’m assuming you share the dream of writers everywhere: to have so much money that Stephen King gets jealous and calls J K Rowling to complain.

** Another assumption, you’re actively trying to improve. You’re taking on board critiques rather than blindly assuming your work is flawless…right?

I’ll be back later with an Andrew update, so gird your loins. 

I’ll be back next week, while Frank* is going to go back to living in your brain.

You remember Frank, right?

He remembers you.